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Have you ever been so consumed by fear that it seems like no matter what you do, you can’t get past it?
That is what blogging is for me. I started this blog so that I could help people and write. Two of my favorite things. Bonus: it gives me a creative outlet that my career in the legal field hasn’t.
So I started my blog. And for a while, I wrote posts and shared them. I had a good momentum going for the first several months. Then the holidays hit and I slowed down. The fear crept in. I told myself things like “I really don’t even know what I’m doing” (Fear of the unknown). “I don’t even really know what I want to write about” (Fear of yourself). “What if people see me as a fraud” (Fear of failure).
The thing is, having to learn how to blog as you go is how most bloggers learn. Everyone starts with 0 posts, 0 followers, and 0 assurance that it’ll work out. But you will never know if you don’t give it an actual go.
How to combat the fear
There are several things you can do to help combat your fears. I’m going to briefly go over several of my go-to tools for helping me push fear aside when I want to get things done.
Affirmations
For example, affirmations are extremely helpful when trying to overcome something. Reinforcing a positive thought will push out the negative.
Affirmation is defined as “the action or process of affirming something or being affirmed”. Positive affirmations are short phrases that reinforces your positive thinking.
Here are a couple examples of positive affirmations that you can start with until you get the hang of it:
- I am fearless
- My strength is greater than any struggle
- I survived all the difficult moments in my past
- There are no blocks I cannot overcome
- I am enough
- My actions are intentional and bring me closer to my goals
- I am always improving, but for today, I have the knowledge I need.
If you would like more examples, do a quick search on Pinterest for “positive affirmations” and you will find lists and lists of them.
Books
I love to read. Most of the time it’s romance novels. I’m your typical hopeless romantic. I love a good love story.
On the other hand, reading non-fiction wasn’t really my thing until just last year. There is this whole section at the library of books that are for self help and professional development. (Yes. I go and check out books from my local library).
Now it’s all in your preference. I fell in love with Brené Brown’s work after hearing her on one of my favorite podcasts, Being Boss. I devoured her TED talks then immediately put her book Daring Greatly, on hold for the audiobook. Once it downloaded I started it. But i only got a few pages in then forgot to finish and before I knew it, it had expired.
Needless to say, sometimes need to be read carefully, for me at least, to fully absorb what they are saying.
Here are some books to read that help in overcoming fear:
- The gifts of imperfection – Brene Brown
- Daring Greatly – Brene Brown
- The Big Leap – Gay Hendricks
- You are a badass: How to stop doubting your greatness and start living an awesome life – Jen Sincero
- Rejection Proof – Jia Jiang
Make a Plan
When you are trying to overcome fear, making a plan to do so is essential so that when you go to work through it, you don’t get paralyzed by not knowing what to do. Here are a few steps that work for me.
1. Acknowledge the Fear
Learn to recognize the fear when you experience it. Like we discussed earlier, there are several different kinds of fears. Right now I’m facing my fear of the unknown by writing this blog post.
This works in different ways for everyone. For me, I write down my fear along with the worst possible scenario. This gets the fear out of my head and onto paper.
This makes you get specific about what you’re actually afraid of too.
2. Feel it
Let yourself feel the fear and experience the feelings that are sent out.
Then embrace it. Fear is meant to help you make the best decisions and make choices which lead to the results you want or need. There is a fine line between letting your fear control your actions, and informing your actions.
3. Do the thing
After you’ve felt the fear. Do the thing that scares you. Publish the blog post. Send that pitch to the potential client.
You cannot overcome your fear without facing it. Pushing yourself out of your comfort zone is how you achieve that. I’m a fearful person so trust me when I say, I get it. It feels funny and uncomfortable.
Overcome the Fear
Fear is an outcome we are scared of that could happen.
That’s right. It hasn’t even happened yet we give it permission to dictate our decisions like it’s set in stone. Being present in the now will help keep the fear back some. Learning how to do this is not easy for me. I’m currently reading Present over Perfect by Shauna Niequist and Brene Brown.
For the longest time, I was set in the next bigger or best thing that I could get my hands on. The better job title. Then the higher paying job. The marriage. The SUV. But every time i would check something off the list, I would still not be fully satisfied.
That is because I wasn’t grateful. I thought I was but I wasn’t really. Take this blueprint and map out how you will work through your fear.
Use affirmations and read positive books that will guide you to facing your own fears. After all, it’s like jumping into a cold pool. It’s only cold for a little while, then you warm up.
What are some fears you’re facing right now? How are you combating them? Leave a comment below.
Until next week.
